This is really just a question to see other people’s views on using spanking as discipline, feel free to give idea’s of other ways to discipline a child (if you feel that spanking is not the best way).
I don’t agree with spanking. I remember getting spanked as a child and it was very traumatic. My parents never hit me at any other time. I remember reaching a certain age and making my parents so mad that spanking was the last resort, but I would continue to make them angry on purpose. It was like, well you’re going to hit me anyway, might as well make it worth it.
Never should a belt or wooden spool or heavy hands be used (I experience the last two, my brother experienced them all). Also spanking does not work past a certain age. It no longer becomes an effective discipline.
I worked with abused kids in a psychiatric treatment facility for 8 years. These kids were very violent and a lot of it was learned by either watching their parents or by being hit themselves. There are so many other effective ways to discipline a child. My motto is "hands are for helping, not hurting."
#1 by Dalice Nelson on October 13th, 2009
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I think as long as it is used sparingly, it is fine. Having said that, I could NEVER hit either of my kids. I just wouldn’t have the stomach for it.
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#2 by kaykins85 on October 13th, 2009
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well i do spank sometimes, it depends what she does, but i have been watching a lot of supernanny lately and have been trying some of her techniques,like the naughty chair and not raising my voice, and keeping her on a schedule, and it has been working very nicely for the past 4 days!
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#3 by ThrockGrl on October 13th, 2009
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i dont think its terrible, but i do think it’s unnecessary. i was spanked as a child and i dont think it ever made me behave better.. well maybe for a moment. but, i do think that you can discipline better with time-outs and taking away priveleges such as video games, phone, going to friends’ etc..
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#4 by Patches6 on October 13th, 2009
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I believe that obnoxious punishment should be done in a quick and on the butt fashion at the time of the incident.
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#5 by teaching_english_are_fun on October 13th, 2009
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Let me preface this by saying I’m not a parent, but I do have experience with children and I do have my own opinions on the matter.
I believe spanking is wrong. We try so hard to teach children to resolve conflicts in a positive way, but when it gets a little difficult, we hit them. That to me is like saying to a child "Never hit anyone. . .unless they do something wrong."
I know being a parent is tough and I wish you luck in your journey.
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#6 by jonesboro_16f on October 13th, 2009
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Obviously you don’t have any children or you wouldn’t be asking these questions. It has been going on for centries and every generation (with an exception for the hippies) has turned out perfectly fine. It is the children who don’t recieve spankings as disipline that usually turn out to be completely spoiled and think that the world owes them something. So, yes I do believe that spankings are a good thing. You can take this how you may, but this is truely the truth.
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#7 by Mommaof2boyz! on October 13th, 2009
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I think spanking is appropriate when used correctly, and what I mean by that is people think smacking of the hands, legs, ect. is the same and it’s NOT!
I do not agree with any of that but I do believe that children deserve a good spanking if they aren’t behaving.
Even the bible says "spare the rod spoil the child"
If you don’t discipline your child then they will run all over you, plus it couls lead to them not ever knowing how to really respect a woman.
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#8 by keviana b on October 13th, 2009
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I thinkthere is not a problem with spanking a child as long as you are not spanking them for everything they do there are some other ways like grounding and timeout but if you have to consistently trll a child to do ths or do that or stop this and stop that then I think it is okay to tap their bottoms or their hands as long as it is not an abusive way of spanking
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#9 by Sarah on October 13th, 2009
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I don’t agree with spanking, EVER, but I don’t have the energy today to keep up with all the answers you’ll get about spanking being fine. Email me if you’d like to hear my other ways to dicipline…
stiggo’s answer below is AWESOME~
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#10 by The MO_Minator on October 13th, 2009
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Spanking is to be done on a childs butt with your hand. Now when they get bigger/older your hand wont work. If a child has done the same thing over and over and talking to them or time outs don’t work, then its time to use a more effective aproche. Parents need to spank there child/children when they need to. I spank my son after talking and grounding no longer work, and I will continue to do so.
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#11 by Dea Y on October 13th, 2009
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i got my butt tanned by my dad when i was a kid.
i’m talking belts, cutting board, switches and woodne spoons just to name a few things.
and you know what that never stopped me from getting in trouble. i mean sure my butt hurt but after a bit it wore off and i was back to putting tacks under the guy next doors tires.
i think that if i ever had kids i would spank them all these activists say it’s abuse but i think that it is necessary. i’m sorry but a 5 year old or hell even a 10 year old can’t be spoken to like an adult they just can’t comprehend what you’re saying to them or aksing them to do.
a good swat on the a$$ now and then won’t kill them
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#12 by waterskater on October 13th, 2009
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I was whipped with a belt for punishment, and I have never forgiven my parents.
Also parents whose parents used physical punishment have a very high rate (70something+) of using the same on their children… Do you want this to be a legacy you leave for your grandchildren?
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social psychology
#13 by fuzzykittyct on October 13th, 2009
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spanking a child , and beating a child are 2 different things, For some reason, because some people didn’t know the difference, it is no longer advisable to spank a child . even though the bible , considered it a training tool.
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#14 by kaliluna on October 13th, 2009
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I don’t agree with spanking. I remember getting spanked as a child and it was very traumatic. My parents never hit me at any other time. I remember reaching a certain age and making my parents so mad that spanking was the last resort, but I would continue to make them angry on purpose. It was like, well you’re going to hit me anyway, might as well make it worth it.
Never should a belt or wooden spool or heavy hands be used (I experience the last two, my brother experienced them all). Also spanking does not work past a certain age. It no longer becomes an effective discipline.
I worked with abused kids in a psychiatric treatment facility for 8 years. These kids were very violent and a lot of it was learned by either watching their parents or by being hit themselves. There are so many other effective ways to discipline a child. My motto is "hands are for helping, not hurting."
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#15 by stiggo629 on October 13th, 2009
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I don’t think it’s right under any circumstances. It teaches the child that physical force is an appropriate way to settle a conflict. It reinforces to the child that since you’re bigger and stronger that makes you right. It tells the child that you don’t respect them enough to discuss your position with them. It tells the child that your position isn’t strong enough to be supported on it’s own. Finally, it makes your child afraid of you.
I was raised with talking, my parents would explain why what was done was wrong, and how it should be done in the future, and why my parents were upset or disappointed with my choice.Turns out, I didn’t repeat my mistakes.And that’s how I’m raising my daughter.
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#16 by C B on October 13th, 2009
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I’m against spanking, I never was spanked as a child. Hitting a child only teaches them how to hit people who they don’t agree with or is doing something they don’t want them to do. If a child parent hits a child for them not sitting down or "acting right", when that same child tells someone else to do something and they arent "acting right" the child only knows that in order to get someone to do something you want them to do you have to hit them.
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#17 by Rach on October 13th, 2009
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Under certain circumstances spanking is absolutely fine as a form of discipline. There is a HUGE difference between spanking and hitting a child. It is NEVER ok to hit a child. There is a proper way to approach spanking and it should never be done out of anger. Also, the child must be old enough to understand why it is getting a spanking. Personally, spankings should be used sparingly and when the occasion comes to use them, they become invaluable teaching reinforcements.
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#18 by bball hotti13 on October 13th, 2009
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i dont think its a good thing. if i had kids i wouldnt be able to hit them. its just setting a bad example for your kids. people who spank their kids are contradicting themselves and sending their kids mixed messages so its no wonder they were doing something wrong in the first place. for instance a parent says dont hit your sister but when the child hits his sister he gets spanked. this is obviously saying to the child its ok to do. if you honestly think you are teaching your kid a lesson, you aren’t. i got spanked sometimes when i was little and now at 14 according to my parents im still a spoiled brat. it obviously doesnt work out that well
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#19 by *another fragment of ur life* on October 13th, 2009
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Spanking is wrong. I know of two children who were routinely beaten just because the parents were overwhelmed by life situations and the children who difficulty communicating due to learning issues. They grew up passive aggressive and very mild mannered with lots of difficulty doing anything but what htey are told. They feel guilty all the time. They are not living solely on thier own strengths yet either.
It’s never right to hit a child.
I don’t spank my own children, and yes, they do naughty things at home sometimes. But they also are KIND to other people and have ideals, want to do good things, believe in God, don’t hate people, don’t think it’s right to hit….
We’ve adopted a "red card, green card" approach in addition to our general live and learn approach. Look it up; some schools use it to control certain behaviors in the classroom.
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#20 by Simons Mom on October 13th, 2009
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I believe in spanking a child on the BUTT (nowhere else!!) if everything else fails (time out, talking, etc.). I was spanked as a child and I think it made me a better person. I can only remember 2 times that I was spanked and that was because I was very careful to be good to avoid it happening. I have seen some VERY BAD children and I know that the parents do not believe in spanking. Rewarding good behavior & ignoring bad behavior does not work!!!
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#21 by Joey on October 13th, 2009
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I think it’s fine. As long as it is not excessive. A young child does not exactly have many priviledges, so those cant be taken away. Timeouts are completely useless because all the child learns is that if they do something wrong, all they have to do is just sit down for 5 minutes. If a child does something wrong and then is spanked for discipline, they will almost never do that same thing againn because every time they think about doing it, they remember the spanking. Spanking does not emotionally damage a child. Millions of kids are spanked when they are children and they turn out great.
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#22 by da3rdxsacharm on October 13th, 2009
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I have 2 boys (15 & 12). I have not had to spank either one in 3 years, but when they were younger, we used spanking only for "willful disobedience". If we told them "no", and they did it anyway, or we told them to do something and they simply refused. It didn’t take long for them to learn. Now they are 6’4" & 5’7" and we never have trouble out of them. They no longer defy us, ever.
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#23 by tm41170 on October 13th, 2009
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I think it is right.
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#24 by olschoolmom on October 13th, 2009
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Spanking works if used sparingly, and as a last resort.
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