Is spanking your child a proper way to discipline your child?
In my opinion no, how can I teach my daughter that there are other ways to tell someone not to do something you don’t like without hitting them if I hit her every time she does something I don’t like.
The only time I’m physical with her, is if she’s about to hurt herself and even then I tap her hand to shock her, not to hurt her and then I explain.
I go with the three strikes and your out rule. For example, we’re out and about, she’s misbehaving so I attempt to put her in her an improvised naughty corner/chair and she says I’m hurting her and gets worse.
Strike one: Mehgan please don’t do that, mummy doesn’t like having to put you in the naughty corner but she will do if you carry on
Strike two: Mehgan stop, mummy loves you and she’s not hurting you, if you carry on I’ll put you in the naughty corner.
Striker three: Mehgan, go and stand in the naughty corner, mummy will come and get you when your 3 minutes is up.
Every time she walks out of the corner I put her back.
She’s learnt, I don’t agree with the theory that some children won’t respond to time-outs of confiscations, if parents are persistent, children will eventually learn that their actions have consequences they don’t like and will stop misbehaving.
They can and will work if given time.
I don’t think there is ever a need to raise a hand to a child, it’s assault if you raise a hand to an adult who can protect themselves, but apparently not to a vulnerable child who can’t protect themselves, in my eyes that’s not right or acceptable. But apparently it is to some people.
With regards to the law, I think "reasonable force" is a load of rubbish, what is reasonable to one parent, isn’t to another, there is too much room for interpretation in the UK laws and I think it needs to be more clearly defined. Not to outlaw smacking altogether as obviously it does work for some parents but to protect children better from real physical abuse that they can’t protect themselves from.
#1 by Bella on July 21st, 2009
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Sometimes yes it is.
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#2 by SnapFeral on July 21st, 2009
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Yes but other alternatives should be tried first.
Even then, don’t leave a mark.
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#3 by simplybrittnie on July 21st, 2009
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That depends on the parent and child. Some children do not respond to being talked to, time outs and having things taken away.
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#4 by Marina on July 21st, 2009
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It depends on what they did. Sometimes spanking is effective in addition to punishment and explanation, lecture, etc.
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#5 by Erin on July 21st, 2009
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It is when used properly and when no other punishment has worked.
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#6 by ????????????3 on July 21st, 2009
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Depends on what they are being disciplined for.
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#7 by calypso3 on July 21st, 2009
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it is always proper or improper. it is also, never proper or improper.
if spanking done right, in your family, gets the desired result, without hurting your children, then yes-it is proper for your family.
some families would say no. but that is what an opinion is for-
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#8 by I LOVE my Thumbs-Down Fairy!!! on July 21st, 2009
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In my personal opinion, no. But that’s just what works for me.
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#9 by kramae on July 21st, 2009
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That’s a tough one. I think that it various on the child and the parent. i don’t feel like you should spank your kids out of anger. I normally use time out or i make my son stick his nose in the corner. Sometimes I even make him do chores ( he is only 4) I tried spanking him but he would just hit me when he was mad at me. In a sense I felt like I was teaching him it was okay to hit when you were mad. I have lots of friends and family members though that spanking worked for so i really feel like it depends on the child.
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#10 by Mary J on July 21st, 2009
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i rarely use spanking as punishment for my children because it is hypocritical. i do not want to them to learn not to do something by me hitting them. i do however think there is an acception. when you need to teach your child like don’t touch a hot stove, don’t run into the street, i smack their hand. it’s not violent but gets the message across that they cannot do that.
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#11 by bmjellyroll89 on July 21st, 2009
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I wouldn’t use spanking as a first resort, if my child did something they shouldn’t of done I would send them to their rooms for the rest of the day and make them lay down and think about what they’ve done along with taking their privilidges away from them for a week or two, spanking IMO should only be used as a last resort.
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#12 by tabbi8407 on July 21st, 2009
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Personally, I am ideally against spanking. However, as long as the spanking is not leaving marks, is not done just to vent frustration, and is used as a last resort, used for important things like running into the street etc, I would not judge another parent for using it. All children are different.
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#13 by BuG on July 22nd, 2009
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yes to a point, as long as you don’t hit hard enough to leave marks, and don’t hit on any other place other then the bottom.
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#14 by Hurley is 6 months old! ? on July 22nd, 2009
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Depends on the situation
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#15 by faulty_barbie_doll on July 22nd, 2009
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In my opinion no, how can I teach my daughter that there are other ways to tell someone not to do something you don’t like without hitting them if I hit her every time she does something I don’t like.
The only time I’m physical with her, is if she’s about to hurt herself and even then I tap her hand to shock her, not to hurt her and then I explain.
I go with the three strikes and your out rule. For example, we’re out and about, she’s misbehaving so I attempt to put her in her an improvised naughty corner/chair and she says I’m hurting her and gets worse.
Strike one: Mehgan please don’t do that, mummy doesn’t like having to put you in the naughty corner but she will do if you carry on
Strike two: Mehgan stop, mummy loves you and she’s not hurting you, if you carry on I’ll put you in the naughty corner.
Striker three: Mehgan, go and stand in the naughty corner, mummy will come and get you when your 3 minutes is up.
Every time she walks out of the corner I put her back.
She’s learnt, I don’t agree with the theory that some children won’t respond to time-outs of confiscations, if parents are persistent, children will eventually learn that their actions have consequences they don’t like and will stop misbehaving.
They can and will work if given time.
I don’t think there is ever a need to raise a hand to a child, it’s assault if you raise a hand to an adult who can protect themselves, but apparently not to a vulnerable child who can’t protect themselves, in my eyes that’s not right or acceptable. But apparently it is to some people.
With regards to the law, I think "reasonable force" is a load of rubbish, what is reasonable to one parent, isn’t to another, there is too much room for interpretation in the UK laws and I think it needs to be more clearly defined. Not to outlaw smacking altogether as obviously it does work for some parents but to protect children better from real physical abuse that they can’t protect themselves from.
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#16 by christian mom on July 22nd, 2009
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Yes. When my son grabs something and he already knows what no means and after telling him no maybe two or three times and still does it i slap his hand..not so hard but just enough to get his attention and to know that that isnt allowed. If they dont react to when you spank him anymore then taking a toy or putting them in time out could help too…every child is different so you should do whatever best fits them and helps them understand that certain things just arent acceptable.
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#17 by laina on July 22nd, 2009
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if they’re under 5 then yes. no hard though, just a good swat. past then they are old enough to know right form wrong and can be punished by other means such as taking away privileges.
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#18 by Blondie on July 22nd, 2009
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No! Its illegal! You can go to jail! Dont be a horrible person and treat your son/daughter like a slave!
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Laws